Whoever said “attitude is everything” had it right.
I’ve been working on some personal changes this year, and one of them is upgrading my attitude toward chores at home.
For example, thinking “I get to” is far more empowering than feeling “I have to.”
Just a little tweak in our thinking to orient it towards gratitude can make a world of difference.
There are certain chores or daily tasks that seem to fall to moms, day after day, in many if not most families. Moms know where everything is and moms are often the ones kids yell for when they need something.
Instead of seeing this as onerous or bothersome, we could choose to look at it as a special gift we’ve been given. We play a unique role in our families, often holding everything and everyone together!
One of my chores that gets old – especially on cold or rainy days – is walking our dogs. It’s something that I generally enjoy doing, but I don’t always appreciate doing it alone. Walking them with one of my family members would be a delight – but they don’t see it that way.
It gets me nowhere to gripe about this. E and Z know how I feel, and they still have no desire to walk the dogs with me. I could feel hurt and complain about it, or I could move on and change my attitude.
Picture how it would feel to think, “I have to walk the dogs daily… no one else helps me with this chore” vs. “My two fur-besties are ALWAYS willing to go for a walk with me… I’m so lucky I get to enjoy this time with them every day!”
Both are true, yet the first one is utterly disempowering and leads me down a path of resentment. There is magic in radical acceptance – and it is a skill that can be mastered with practice.
The fact is, my role in this household has changed. Since starting my own business and dropping my hours down to part-time, I have far more free time than E. Therefore, it only makes sense that I pick up more of the household chores and tasks.
While in the past I’ve resisted traditional household gender roles – and I still reject them as something gender-based – I love the fact that I have more time at home now, as well as more free time. I’m glad that I’m able to use some of that time to keep our home running more smoothly and make sure we all have clean clothes to wear and good food to eat.
Are there things in your life that you can’t control, and which are dragging you down or bumming you out? See if reframing the way you think could improve your attitude and how you feel about your day-to-day lived experience.
I’m not saying this Jedi mind trick will work for everything – and families SHOULD all work together and not leave everything to one parent – but it has helped me feel better about certain household chores and tasks.
