I felt validated as a parent while watching the 2025 Netflix reboot of the classic Judy Blume novel Forever.
Warning: this blog post contains spoilers about the show, so if you haven’t watched it yet, go do that and come back to read this afterward. You’ve been warned!
I watched the new show Forever with my teen recently and found it to be a wonderful experience, although, of course, the clumsy first-time sex scenes were “cringey” according to my daughter.
When I first read the book in the 1980s, I remember finding those parts of the story super awkward and embarrassing myself. I mean, come on. Ralph? Ick.
But back to the advice I’ve given my daughter since she was old enough to even think about dating.
I’ve always said, from day one, that any high school love and romance should ideally end before you to go to college. Even if you’re in a wonderful, long-term relationship during your senior year in high school, it’s best to break up with that person before you go to college. Heck, ideally break up with them before senior year so you can focus on your friends and finding yourself!
This is a lesson I learned the hard way through my own life experiences. I had a boyfriend all through high school who was the best of the best – truly an amazing first love, prom date and best friend for those three years. But I knew that I should start college focused on myself, my experiences and my future. So, I tried my best to break up with him before I went away to college. I really did!
But he wasn’t willing to let me go, and I felt too guilty and conflicted to hold that boundary. That precipitated a challenging multi-year period of trying to break free, ultimately cheating on him, and overall being far too entangled in boyfriends and relationships to truly have or appreciate the full college experience. I don’t want that for our girl.
That’s why I was so delighted to see the characters in the new Forever show on Netflix model strength of character and a rock solid sense of self that I simply did not have yet as a high school senior.
They have their struggles and doubts, but over the course of the first season of Forever, it becomes clear that both characters know they should break up before parting to go their separate ways to college. I thought it would be the empowered Keisha to sever their bond, but instead, surprisingly, it was the less-secure Justin who stepped up and did the hard thing.
It’s never easy to break up with someone – less so when it’s someone you truly love! But sometimes, it’s the best thing. When we’re enmeshed in a relationship, we’re not truly focused on ourselves, opening ourselves up to new possibilities, meeting new people or learning new things.
Along with depicting Black joy, wonderful parenting and two strong young people successfully navigating the ups and downs of modern high school life – including its digital pitfalls – I’m so glad that Forever did such a great job showcasing how important it is to go off to college fully focused on oneself and one’s own goals for the future.
Did you have a similar takeaway from the show? If you watched it, with or without teens, I’d love to hear your thoughts!
