We all need rules to get through life.
Some of us don’t like to call them rules and that’s fine. You can call them whatever you like – but all of us have guidelines or directives that we follow.
They can be unspoken and unwritten rules – like being sure to tip your server and anyone else providing you with personal service. They can also be clear, enforceable laws like speed limits.
As a 28-year tattoo collector and Tattoo Doula, I have some rules of my own. It’s honestly funny to me that I’ve never written them down before. They’ve been living in my head all this time.
When something is permanent, it bears taking some time and thinking about the right plan. That’s why I recommend that anyone starting out on a journey of tattoo collecting should think about it first and come up with rules or guidelines of their own.
Here are mine.
- Wait for it. Just like my favorite song from Hamilton, the best rule of all when it comes to tattoos is “wait for it.” This can mean waiting until you’re 18 or 21 (or even 25 like I did) before you make permanent changes to your body. As humans, we grow and change all the time; how do you know you’ll have the same taste or aesthetic when you’re older? Do you have the same taste and preferences as you did 5 or 10 years ago? My “wait for it” tip also applies to each tattoo collected; I have a few smaller tattoos that were spontaneous, but I’ve waited for a year or more before each big tattoo. Especially when you’re first starting out as a collector, there’s no harm in waiting. You can use that waiting time to hone and refine your design. I waited more than 20 years for my first sleeve.
- No “job killers” This means stay away from your hands, face and throat when considering tattoo location. There are still some negative stigmas associated with tattoos and there are still people who are very anti-tattoo. Why hurt your chance at gainful employment? I highly recommend starting with easily-covered tattoo spots at first. I had my entire torso tattooed before moving on to my arms. Keep your skin art collection in line with your career or the career you hope to have. Don’t ink yourself out of a job you want – that would really sting.
- Go big or go home. I actually hate this expression because it sounds toxically masculine but, at the same time, it fits so well here. Smaller tattoos don’t hold up to the tests of sun and time as well as bigger, bolder tattoos do. There’s a reason old-school artists say “Bold will Hold.” I know tiny, fine-line tattoos are on-trend right now but we’ll see if they hold up in 20 or 30 years. They may be fuzzy and hard to make out – or possibly covered by other tattoos. If you want tattoos that will last forever, the way they are meant to, then listen to your artist when they tell you to go bigger or bolder.
- Quality over quantity. Hopefully, it goes without saying, but tattoos are not something you want to skimp or go cheap on. I’m not saying you should always choose the most expensive artist but cheaper is almost never better when it comes to tattoos. The prices artists charge reflect their experience, expertise and reputation. The one exception to this is if you can somehow find a super-talented artist who is still new to tattooing; then you can thank your lucky stars to get great tattoos that are also affordable (that’s honestly how I started my collection).
- Have a strategy. This kind of goes along with giving yourself time to think through your planned tattoo: you also want to have a sense of what other, future tattoos might be like and how you want to organize the art on your body. Will all of them tell a story, or will they be independent of each other? What kind of collector do you aspire to be? Tattoos’ permanence gives them the gravitas of deserving this much thought. That doesn’t mean you should never do spontaneous, spur-of-the-moment tattoos, just that you might want to think through where those fit into your overall plan for your skin. I have a few spontaneous tattoos that I love – and others that I have since covered up.
- Artist over everything. Your tattoos will last longer than most everything in your life – including many relationships. For that reason, you should spend time researching the right artist for you. There are so many factors to consider that go way beyond just the kind of art you want drilled into your skin. If you’re collecting large pieces, you will end up spending hours, weeks, months and even years with your artist. Make sure you get along, respect each other and appreciate what they stand for. Sharing good vibes with your tattoo artist makes the process better for everyone.
- Aftercare, aftercare, aftercare. If you think the hardest part of getting tattooed is sitting for the drill, please pay attention. The true work comes afterward when you spend days focusing on applying just the right amount of lotion, avoiding the urge to scratch or pick, and staying out of pools, hot tubs, lakes and oceans. You can go to the best artist and get the best work in the world, but if you don’t take care of it while it’s healing, you may still have problems. Do the tedious work of aftercare well, and you’ll be happy forever. And please note that aftercare continues for the life of your tattoo, per the next point below!
- Say goodbye to the sun. If you’ve ever wanted to be a vampire, you’re in luck. The sun fades, distorts and warps tattoos. Being heavily tattooed with art you love means staying away from the big tattoo-killer in the sky. If you want your skin art to stand the test of time and look bright and beautiful for decades, you will heed my advice: use sunscreen rigorously, wear a rashguard and above all seek shade whenever and wherever possible. This will benefit not just your tattoos but all of your skin and ultimately your health. Embrace it. You’re a creature of the night now.
- Love the skin you’re in. One of my favorite things about tattoos is the way they ultimately made me love myself more. After becoming tattooed over much of my body, I developed a tendency to only cherish or care for the parts of me that are covered with ink. Then I realized how nuts that was and I’ve taken steps to work on loving my whole self. I guess my only point here is to remember to love and care for the whole you – all of you – not just your tattooed parts. All of you is worthy and wonderful, just as you are.
- Mind over matter. Another thing I love about tattoos is how much the process has taught me about what I’m capable of. I began collecting tattoos long before I knew how much pain I could tolerate. After a particularly rough session, I remember my artist telling me “Well, looks like you’re all set to have a baby now, since childbirth will be easy after all this.” Turns out he was wrong, childbirth and parenting bring on pain unlike any other – but it’s true that learning how to exert discipline over myself during long tattoo sittings has helped me in many other areas of life. Mind over matter is a powerful thing to learn. The pain of tattooing has lessons for us if we choose to listen.
Just remember that some rules were made to be broken. Everyone with tattoos has a certain amount of lawless, ungovernable rebel in them – myself included. I am a Gen Xer, after all.
So maybe don’t be too rigid with your rules, but give some thought to how both tattoos and rules can make your life better sometimes.
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